The past few weeks, I’ve allowed myself to pile my mind up with so many ideas that I was beginning to lose myself in all the clutter. I want to do this… I want to do that… my mind was non-stop with wonderful ideas. I began to feel this feeling of uneasiness and overwhelm so I had to take a few steps back and look at my mindset and start to communicate more with God. I began to talk out loud saying ” God, this can’t be right I’m feeling overwhelmed and way too anxious”. The answered I got back was an eye opener for me ” Just because you are following me, doesn’t make you superwoman”. Why would I think I could take on so many things at once. Now I know.
Dreams take time and they can only be accomplished one day at a time. There’s no need to try and pack all your dreams into a month or year. As long as you are making progress each and every day you are one day closer. Sometimes we just have to take in the learning process and enjoy the journey, because if we are piling our plates with too much stuff we might miss a value lesson or a blessing.
I say this to encourage anyone who is on a journey to fulfilling their dreams and are feeling overwhelmed never be afraid to go back to the basic and center your focus. When your mind is focused beautiful things are birthed, so take one step at a time. Gather a few goals and complete those before moving to the next. Beautiful things take time to blossom and as long as you continue to nurture it, it will continue to grow.
I get this question asked a lot “why don’t you take your meds?” they ask if there is medication for your diagnosis why aren’t you utilizing it? Honestly, I’ve always been someone to take up on a challenge, but this is not the reason I quit taking my meds. Some days my meds helped me and some days it caused me to feel much worse than I already was. I just got tired of taking so many meds a day and being so isolated life just felt numb to me and no reason to live in it. So I got the courage 4 years ago to grab all my meds and toss them for good! Here are 5 reasons why;
Steroids- I started taking prednisone at 14 and even though it made me feel better it was still covering up the root cause. It caused me to gain so much weight, I hated it. It was a temporary fix, I was tired of the temporary.
Consistency- I was prescribed a lot of meds that were both for cancer and autoimmune diseases so my hair will grow to fall out. If I caught a cold or the flu I would have to stop the meds until it passed. For some reason all the side effects of the meds that only show in a few people, I was always that few! So doctors’ were always switching my meds trying new things.
Sleepiness- It’s already tough being a mother, it’s so much harder when you can’t even stay awake. I would be so out of it and by the time I would wake up the sun was down and the day escaped me. So, how did I keep a job? Caffeine! it was my BFF I drunk about 10 cups a day just to get me by, but I would only end up sicker than I was because caffeine is a big trigger when I’m having a flare-up. There was nothing I could do because my body became so immune to the meds so quickly they would have to bump it up to a higher dosage.
Addiction- I became addicted to Xanax, I found myself popping pills when I wasn’t even having anxiety just because they made me feel a little alive. I could smile on days I really didn’t have it in me. I drank a lot because it made me numb and in that moment took me away from that person I hated most (Sick Shawna).
Family- I was missing out on family, I avoided family gatherings because I would be so nervous of questions (Wow, Shawna you gained weight or Wow, you have gotten so skinny) yea…yea.. if only you knew my struggles. I couldn’t stand loud noises and I didn’t want them to see me have an anxiety attack because I was afraid to be around a big crowd. I just go tired of explaining myself.
I got tired of living this way, and I couldn’t stand another day of it. So I prayed to God…well more liked screamed, hollered and sobbed. I said enough is enough, I won’t continue to live my life this way and gave myself away to God so he could use me. That’s when I tried my first Daniel fast, started detoxing and doing so much research. God started to overflow my mind with things that needed to be done and they work for me. Some days get tough but I press on because God is greater than my illness. See my illness had me bound on the verge to committing suicide and ending it all but God said otherwise. I feel so free and full of life, this is my why. I have now found my purpose in life. I wasn’t created to be sick my whole life, but to find God and fulfill the purpose he created me for. I was just a person that the medication didn’t work out for. I’m just glad to be medication free and living life with a purpose.
Mother’s Day is approaching soon and I wanted to do something special for the month of May! So I have linked up with Syneka from STRENGTH & VIRTUE™. We will be digging into 20 Women from the Bible. I pray this will bless you.
Fear is a big overtaker in our lives it destroys our dreams and potentials. It disables us from doing great things in this world that were meant to be. Fear has been with us since little toddlers afraid to see momma or daddy go, afraid to be bold..afraid afraid afraid!
Let me tell you this thing today, the enemy wants to keep you in fear. The devil has a way of doing things backwards because he wants you to keep going backwards.
Devil wants you to have fear which holds you bound and God wants you to be raef which is to excel in everything just by being yourself. Fear spelled backwards is raef, see what I’m saying.
Once you identify the fear slowly try to overcome it, this won’t be easy but it is always worth it. Fear has no place living in you so tell it and its supplier to kick rock. You have the victory!
So last night I was browsing through movies and came across I am not ashamed. I love watching movies while I doze off, but this movie caught my attention I found myself sitting up and wanting a snack because it was that good. I laughed and cried but most of all it made me think.
This movie is based on a true story; about a girl named Rachael Joy she went Columbine High School. I related so much to her maybe that’s why it touched me so much. She always knew she loved God, but had trouble expressing it fully and accepting Him with all her heart. As young women, we just want to fit in but something inside us is just different, we try doing what our friends do but inside our, hearts we feel convicted and feel we don’t belong.
In all reality we just want people to see us for who we are and accept us, we don’t want to lose relationships just because we love God. We want to build relationships because we love God. Racheal Joy began to realize how much she needed God and she wanted Him to do great things in her life, most importantly she wanted to be a light for Him. If you feel this way..God wants you too.
She dealt with non-believers, betrayal and more that we all go through as a young teen but she didn’t let it stop her from showing love to people. She kept smiling and helping other teens realize their potential in Christ. Some were upset because she loved God, and that’s normal but will you still stand up for him if they ask?
This movie was so powerful it is a must watch movie especially for teens. We all have a calling on our lives we just have to accept it and let God take over.It won’t be easy, but it’s worth it.
Each of us is given a purpose to fulfill in this world. None of us have the same talent because we were all made differently. We may have the same goals, but our purpose in life is assigned differently to each and every one of us. God had a purpose when he created each of us, he put all his heart and soul to little us to bring back something special. Sometimes it takes a while to find what our purpose in life is with all the detours we journey on, but deep down within our hearts crave something more. Something that we can pour our hearts into, something that we can give our all too, something that’s going to make us feel so exciting that it’s going to overflow and you just can’t keep it to yourself.
That’s when you know your purpose is about to create your destiny. Everything will start to fall in place when you are on the right track. Doors that you thought were closed will now become open because you are now walking in your purpose to your destination. There is always a reason why God gave you a certain purpose, it’s because he believes you can do it. He knows your future and he knows what you are able to do, he wants to see you reach your destination but first, you must fulfill your purpose.
Life has its ups and downs so, I know if you are human you will have a few storms in your life. These storms can be small and all the way up to life-threatening storms and we try to handle things all on our own. I’ve been there and found out that trying to handle these storms on my own I start to get weak and burnt out because I am relying on just my physical help. I can try and try but when it is all said and done, I hit a dead end and there is nowhere to run and then I’m all out of answers.
In the bible, the disciples had a situation that needed immediate attention or their lives could have been lost. They were in a storm that was ready to destroy their lives, but they knew a man named Jesus ( a name that’s powerful than any name) they call upon the name of the Lord. He came out and told the storm “Peace Be Still”, and the storm ceased, God said unto them why are you so fearful, do you not have faith? We don’t have to handle our storms by our self, we have to become more like the disciples and call on Jesus.One thing we must have is faith, do not be afraid. Our storms are raging and ready to take us out, but we have something special on our side we just have to utilize Him. We have to be strong and stand firm on God’s word so we are able to stand and tell our storms “Peace Be Still” in Jesus name without fear, but with boldness.
Mark 4:39-40 And he arose, and rebuked the wind, and said unto the sea, Peace, be still. And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm. 40 And he said unto them, Why are ye so fearful? how is that ye have no faith?
Our storms may frighten us and the wind may be strong, but continue to stand on God and remember what Jesus says ” Where is your faith?” Stand firm and point out your storms by name and tell them where to go.
This Sunday, I was scrolling through my phone and I seen this picture of my daughter. I took this two years ago while we were outside. It’s reminds me of how to enjoy life, kids don’t have a care in the world they live day by day. Us as adults are so caught up in work and how we need to pay our bills that we forget to pause and breathe and just live. Tomorrow is never promised, enjoy the moment!
Have you ever wanted to do something, but every time you tried it seemed like you always ran into a stumbling block? I always knew some type of writing was my calling when you are passionate about something it’s not going to leave so easily. My mind was constantly moving, but every time I would try to write everything would go blank. I would give up and come back to writing every year and do the same thing. I left my computer feeling dumb and frustrated .
I was told by the doctor that it was (fibro-fog) one of the symptoms of fibromyalgia . This year I won’t let it stop me, I’m going to do all I can to be successful at this. Bible says ” I can do all things through Christ, that gives me strength” I believe this.